The Post That Wasn't "Post" To Happen.

It is even more difficult to get your foot to your mouth when you have a pregnant belly in the way.
At the moment I am experiencing this firsthand.

Yes, you read that correctly. Although, I wish it were anything but true.

To begin with... I want to say that it took a year of "trying" to get pregnant with Reagan. And 9 months for Elsa.
I remember the disappointment that I would feel each month when I wasn't pregnant, particularly with Reagan. At the time, I was reading about "celebrities", such as Britney Spears, and Nicole Richie having babies, and I couldn't understand why God would send precious babies to these irresponsible hussies, but not to me?!

With both of my girls, I learned that; there was a plan for me. I felt that both Reagan, and Elsa came to our family when they were supposed to.

This time around, I'm not feeling that so much.

At the end of February, I went to remove my Nuva Ring, and discovered that it was gone. Missing. Lost.
I honestly, didn't think too much about it, because: considering my past history, I figured there was no conceivable (pun intended) way that I could be pregnant.
I started a new month of Birth Control, and went on my way.

After that there were "signs", but I didn't put things together for quite a while. To begin with, one day I went to visit my friend, Jacki, and as I was getting dressed that morning I looked in the mirror and thought "where did this muffin top come from"? A little while later, I was doing a full-cleaning of the house. After the girls went down for their nap, I decided to tackle the master bathroom. As I walked in to my bedroom I felt completely exhausted, and I literally could not find the energy the clean the bathroom. Instead, I collapsed on the bed and took a two hour nap!

I mentioned this to my Primary Care Physician, when I went in to see her for the sinus infection I had a while ago.

I told her it was so weird that I went from feeling awesome, to feeling downright awful in a short period of time. This doctor is the one that has been monitoring my thyroid since I had Elsa, so she ran some more thyroid tests. And called me back to let me know that my thyroid level as just fine.
Puzzling? Because I still felt awful.

I threw up all three days that I took the antibiotic for the sinus infection. Nick attributed it to the RX.

And let's not forget about my raging PMS. I was irrational, and hated EVERYONE (even worse than usual).
It was at this point that I asked Nick to bring home a pregnancy test from the pharmacy, just to rule it out.

I had also been having horrible headaches (I've never been a headache person), and thought a more likely answer to all of my symptoms was a brain tumor.

Nick never brought home the pregnancy test, and kept telling me that I wasn't pregnant.

So, I went out and purchased a pregnancy test on my own. After it came back positive, I sincerely wished that it had been a brain tumor, instead.
I was also an emotional wreck. For the next 24 hours I was useless, all I could do was cry.

I am SO not that girl. The one that has 3 kids ages 3 and under. And even after time has passed, I still can't figure it out? I have so many friends that are far more maternal than I am. AND a lot of friends that want more kids. Why then, am I the one that is having the unplanned baby? I still don't know?

The timing could not possibly be any worse. For Heaven's sake, I already have a baby! Elsa. And we booked our trip to Orlando, for Nick's Grandpa's birthday, ages ago. Our trip is set for November 12-19. And, OF COURSE, I am due the first week in November.
For those of you out there calculating madly... I am 13 weeks right now.

Under normal circumstances, I wouldn't have announced so early. However, we are leaving for NYC on Monday; and I already look pregnant. I thought I'd just dispel any speculation before I posted pictures from that vacation.

I haven't felt well, but it has been nothing compared to how I felt during pregnancy with the girls. I was so sick with both Reagan and Elsa, that I couldn't eat much, and anything I did manage to swallow didn't stay down. I didn't gain weight until week 15-ish with both pregnancies.

This time around, if I don't eat I feel sick. I am hungry All. Of. The. Time. I gained 7 pounds from week 8 to week 12! And I was starting out the heaviest I've ever been at the start of a pregnancy.
I feel like my rear-end is getting fatter at the same rate my stomach is. Attractive, I know.
Losing weight after this baby is going to be super-fun, I just know it.

And let's not forget the emotional instability. This pregnancy, has taken mine to a whole new level. I've been angrier than ever before. And I cry at the drop of a hat.
I've never been the "weepy" type. In fact, my eyes have always been dry at the end of movies that were 100% tearjerkers, such as 8 Seconds. I went to see Wall-e and Up, when I was pregnant with Reagan and Elsa, respectively. And I didn't shed a tear.
This time around... I cried silently, and steadily all through Steve Carell's last episode on The Office. I cried when Reagan's Nursery leader gave me a block with Reagan's hand prints on it as a gift for Mother's Day. I have cried while reading blog posts, and articles on KSL's news website. It is ridiculous.

Also, I have ZERO energy. Even though my thyroid medication is spot-on. I know I have been a slacker friend. All I can say is: my apologies; and if you aren't understanding, there isn't much I can do about it. I do a poor job of keeping up on emails, these days; and I don't expect that to change any time soon.

I know that I was very vocal about being "done" having kids. And I did feel content with two children. I am far from thrilled about being pregnant again.

I'm not even going to venture a guess as to the gender of this baby. It doesn't matter anyway, because it WILL be our last. Guaranteed.

Some of you may remember a prior post, where I mentioned that we'd be naming any son we had "Jimmer". Oh, the irony. I was actually pregnant when I wrote that, only I didn't know it. At the time, I thought we were done having kids. I am fairly certain that I was lying when I wrote it too, as I doubt that we really will name the kid (if it's a boy) Jimmer.

It has made me sad to realize that I have not lived near my Mom during any of my pregnancies. I miss her a great deal (typing this will probably bring on another crying jag). And wish she were here to help me.

I wouldn't be surviving without my sweet husband, who has yet to issue an opinion about the whole thing (mostly, I think, because he is terrified of me). He allows me to go to bed at 6PM on the nights when I am "done", and he gets the girls to bed. Also, he has been doing the dishes on a regular basis (something he hasn't done since I was pregnant with Reagan)!


The only good thing that has come of this "to date" is that Nick hired me a housekeeper. At least my house is now clean one day a week.